{"id":515,"date":"2022-10-17T09:01:31","date_gmt":"2022-10-17T09:01:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/olicentar.rs\/?post_type=koristan_sadr_aj&p=515"},"modified":"2022-10-26T09:14:44","modified_gmt":"2022-10-26T09:14:44","slug":"neutralizacija-mentalizacija-i-sposobnost-za-ljubav","status":"publish","type":"koristan_sadr_aj","link":"https:\/\/olicentar.rs\/sr\/koristan_sadr_aj\/neutralizacija-mentalizacija-i-sposobnost-za-ljubav\/","title":{"rendered":"Neutralizacija, mentalizacija i sposobnost za ljubav"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Neutralizacija (i mentalizacija) \u2013 razboritost, regulator psihe \u2013 i sposobnost za ljubav<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Govorili smo ve\u0107 o tome da je neutralizacija promena \u010diste, instiktualne energije u oblike energije koji su prikladniji za funkcionisanje ega (neutralizovane energije), <\/strong>to jest oblike energije koje karakteri\u0161e visok nivo kontrole ega i kapacitet za odlaganje neposrednog instiktualnog zadovoljenja. <\/strong>Kada organizam do\u0111e u stanje neravnote\u017ee (vi\u0161ak ili manjak ne\u010dega), energija nagona se pokre\u0107e da bi se zadovoljila potreba i povratilo stanje ravnote\u017ee. Me\u0111utim, nagonska energija je kao neobuzdani konj. Sirova instiktualna energija preplavljuje Ego i dovodi do \u201ekur\u0161lusa\u201c, ispada u funkcionisanju.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kako to prakti\u010dno izgleda? Osoba \u010dije se kognitivne funkcije napajaju neneutralizovanim energijom ima iskrivljenu sliku stvarnosti. <\/strong>Ako su kognitivne funkcije (opa\u017eanje, mi\u0161ljenje, pam\u0107enje) napajane agresijom, osoba \u0107e u stvarnosti tra\u017eiti i videti znake opasnosti i agresivnosti, tra\u017ei\u0107e \u201edlaku u jajetu\u201c, negativne komponente stvarnosti koji \u0107e opravdavati njegovu agresivnost. Njegova percepcija \u0107e biti usmerena na negativne, ugro\u017eavaju\u0107e aspekte stvarnosti, na negativne osobine drugih ljudi\u2026Na taj na\u010din \u0107e i tuma\u010diti dobijene podatke, obra\u0111ivati ih, pamtiti \u201esamo lo\u0161e stvari\u201c\u2026Ako su kognitivne funkcije napajane neneutralizovanom seksualnom energijom, osoba \u0107e, tako\u0111e, iskrivljavati stvarnost, u svemu videti seksualnost, erotizovati one kognitivne funkcije koje nisu seksualne, videti samo one aspekte osobe koji se uklapaju u njene seksualne potrebe (kao kad se ka\u017ee za mu\u0161karca, na primer, da razmi\u0161lja \u201edonjom glavom\u201c). Naravno, seksualna energija mo\u017ee biti usmerena na oralnost, analnost, falusnost\u2026i osoba mo\u017ee erotizovati kognitivne funkcije oralnom, analnom ili falusnom seksualno\u0161\u0107u i agresijom. Posledica toga je da osoba ne opa\u017ea, ne misli, ne pamti jasno, neiskrivljeno. Svakodnevnim jezikom izra\u017eeno, to su stanja koje ljudi opa\u017eaju i opisuju kao \u201eudarili mu hormoni u glavu\u201c ili \u201ezaslepeo ga je bes\u201c, \u201eljubav je slepa\u201c, \u201epona\u0161a se impulsivno\u201c, \u201enepromi\u0161ljeno\u201c, \u201ebrzopleto\u201c\u2026Sve su to opisi iskrivljavanja kognitivnih funkcija neneutralizovanim instiktualnim energijama (afektima). Opisi kao \u0161to su: \u201eostaje trezven i u emotivno nabijenim situacijama\u201c, \u201erazborita osoba\u201c, \u201erealna osoba\u201c, \u201ene gubi glavu\u201c, \u201erazmi\u0161lja hladne glave\u201c \u201eobjektivna osoba\u201c\u2026govore o kognitivnim funkcijama osoba sposobnih za neutralizaciju. To ne zna\u010di da je racionalna, realna osoba, bez energije, da je potisnula svoje instikte ili ih ugasila, da je aseksualna ili da nema potrebnu agresivnost. Ona nije \u201emrtvo puvalo\u201c, mislilac bez emocija, robot, kompjuter\u2026Njen ego ima puno energije, ali je ta energija dobrim delom neutralna i slu\u017ei egu za funkcije adaptacije na stvarnost, na zadovoljenje potrebe na najadekvatniji, najadaptabilniji na\u010din.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

U diskusiji o neutralizaciji razmatrali smo dve njene strane \u2013 1) neutralizovanje instiktualne energije, <\/strong>pretvaranje instiktualne energije u energiju dostupnu egu za obavljanje mentalnih procesa, i 2) stvaranje odre\u0111enih mentalnih sposobnosti \u2013 sekundarno autonomnih funkcija<\/strong> koje su nastale kroz re\u0161avanje konflikata (npr. op\u0161ta sposobnost re\u0161avanja problema, planiranja i organizovanja akcije\u2026) i koriste se tom neutralizovanom energijom kao trajnim i stabilnim \u201egorivom\u201c. Ova druga strana neutralizacije blisko je povezana sa konceptom mentalizacije.<\/strong> (Fonagy, P., 2001,2002,2005).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mentalizacija je sposobnost da mentalno obra\u0111ujemo svoje emocije, afektivna stanja, tenzije\u2026umesto da ih praznimo kroz pona\u0161anje bez razmi\u0161ljanja. Takvo obra\u0111ivanje omogu\u0107uje \u010doveku da razume sopstvena emotivna stanja, kao i stanja drugih ljudi, da stvori \u201eteoriju uma\u201c <\/strong>(sposobnost deteta koje se razvija na uobi\u010dajeni na\u010din, da pripisuje mentalna stanja kao \u0161to su \u017eelje, uverenja, namere sebi i drugima, kao na\u010din da osmisli i predvidi pona\u0161anje drugih (Tager-Flusberg & Baron-Cohen, 1993). Sposobnost podrazumeva razumevanje toga da pona\u0161anje drugih ljudi sadr\u017ei nameru ili svrhu, da ih motivi\u0161e \u017eelja da iska\u017eu svoje mentalno stanje ili da komuniciraju sa drugima.). <\/strong>Teorija uma opisuje kako je mogu\u0107e drugima pripisati pogre\u0161na uverenja, dok mentalizacija ili refleksivna funkcija ozna\u010dava razumevanje sopstvenog pona\u0161anja kao i pona\u0161anja drugih u terminima mentalnih stanja. Odrasle osobe sa problemima neutralizacije i mentalizacije imaju i ozbiljne probleme u sposobnosti za ljubav. Nisu u stanju da vladaju svojim afektima \u2013 obuzimaju ih, kao \u0161to nisu u stanju da razumeju svoje postupke, pa ni postupke drugih. <\/strong>Oni \u201crazmi\u0161ljaju emocijama\u201d, donose zaklju\u010dke prema tome kako se ose\u0107aju, ono \u0161to ose\u0107aju mora biti istina, zato \u0161to oni tako ose\u0107aju.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u010cesto se de\u0161ava da su osobe sa problemima neutralizacije ponosne na tu svoju nesposobnost. Smatraju sebe izuzetnio emotivnima i iskrenima (\u201e\u0161to na um, to na drum\u201c ), strastvenim osobama koje se \u201epredaju\u201c emocijama, vole \u201edo daske\u201c, mrze \u201edo daske\u201c\u2026ulaze \u201esrcem\u201c u sve\u2026iako ih to \u010desto dovodi u nevolje i stvara probleme (to smatraju posledicom \u201eiskrenosti\u201c, \u201eneuvijanja u celofan\u201c\u2026). Nazivaju sebe \u201eemotivcima\u201c. Me\u0111utim, tu se ne radi o slobodnom ispoljavanju emocija, ve\u0107 o nesposobnosti obrade i artikulacije emocija. Takve osobe \u201esrljaju\u201c u nepromi\u0161ljena pona\u0161anja, nestrpljive su i impulsivne, sklone velikim oscilacijama raspolo\u017eenja i afekata, \u201eplahovite\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nedovoljna sposobnost neutralizacije \u010dini ljude nepredvidljivima. To pla\u0161i partnere sa kojima \u017eive, decu koju vaspitavaju i prijatelje sa kojima su u odnosima. Naj\u010de\u0161\u0107a reakcija je da im se \u201eide uz dlaku, da ne bi popizdeli\u201c. Drugi \u010dlan para preuzima ulogu regulatora emocija. Poku\u0161ava da \u201esti\u0161a strasti\u201c, da \u201ene raspaljuje vatru\u201c\u2026\u010cesto osobe sa problemima neutralizacije dobijaju etiketu \u201epalidrvce\u201c. Ni oni sami, nakon emotivnih ispada \u201ene znaju \u0161ta im bi\u2026\u201c, \u0161to ukazuje na nesposobnost mentalizacije, makar naknadne obrade sopstvenih emocija, razumevanja uzroka svojih pona\u0161anja\u2026Kako ne razumeju sebe, tako ne razumeju i druge. Takve osobe su nepromi\u0161ljena, reaktivna bi\u0107a nestalnog i nepredvidljivog pona\u0161anja.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Napomenuli smo da zrela sposobnost da se voli zahteva brigu, odgovornost, po\u0161tovanje i poznavanje<\/strong> (From, 1990). Osobe sa problemima neutralizacije mogu biti bri\u017ene, ali je, \u010desto, njihova briga nerazumna, optere\u0107ena njima nerazumljivim impulsima, nepromi\u0161ljena, \u0161to bitno umanjuje i njihovu sposobnost za odgovornost (odgovornost je odgovor na potrebe stvarnosti, potrebe druge osobe \u2013 a to zahteva da razumemo drugu osobu, imamo njenu \u201eteoriju uma\u201c, pa da odgovorimo u skladu sa razumevanjem. Osobe sa problemima neutralizacije odgovaraju plahovito, vo\u0111ene vi\u0161e sopstvenim impulsima nego potrebama drugoga. Nedostatak mentalizacije im onemogu\u0107ava da mentalno obrade emotivne sadr\u017eaje pre nego \u0161to reaguju, a i da nakon reakcije \u201eporazmisle o tome i izvuku pouku\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Opisuju\u0107i sastojke zrelog \u201eume\u0107a ljubavi\u201c From ka\u017ee:\u201cPo\u0161tovanje <\/strong><\/em>\u2013 znamo ko je zbilja objekat na\u0161e ljubavi, pru\u017eamo sve \u0161to imamo, dobro znaju\u0107i sve mane voljene osobe, ne pridaju\u0107i joj osobine koje bismo \u017eeleli da je karakteri\u0161u.\u201d, <\/em>\u201cPoznavanje<\/strong><\/em> \u2013 omogu\u0107ava da zanemarimo svoju emotivnu reakciju i voljenu osobu vidimo kao \u0161to se ona vidi. Prodiremo u dubinu njene li\u010dnosti i znamo kako joj pomo\u0107i. Na ovaj na\u010din poku\u0161avamo otkriti tajnu ljudske prirode, jer ako se odreknemo kognitivnog puta, misli i destrukcije, nasilja i rastavljanja jedinke, \u0161to je samo uni\u0161tava, ostaje nam samo put ljubavi. To sjedinjenje daje nam ose\u0107aj da smo postali jedno sa voljenom osobom i sa celim svijetom, da smo upoznali. No, <\/em>ovom ose\u0107aju spajanja mora predhoditi kongitivno poznavanje psihi\u010dkih osobina osobe koju volimo\u201d. <\/strong><\/em>Jasno je da osoba sa problemima neutralizacije i mentalizacije ima velikih te\u0161ko\u0107a da ispuni ovo \u0161to From opisuje. Da \u201czanemari svoju emotivnu reakciju i osobu vidi kao \u0161to se ona vidi\u201d\u2026Nedostatak mentalizacije onemogu\u0107ava kognitivno poznavanje psihi\u010dkih osobina osobe koju volimo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sli\u010dan problem imaju i partneri osoba sa ovakvim problemima. Te\u0161ko im je da ih \u201espoznaju\u201c, jer ni oni ne poznaju sami sebe, pa nisu u stanju da jasnije artikuli\u0161u svoja ose\u0107anja i stanja. \u010cesto \u010dujemo izjave partnera o tome kako vi\u0161e ne mogu da ih po\u0161tuju, jer ni oni sami ne po\u0161tuju sebe. Ka\u017eu: \u201ekako da po\u0161tujem nekoga ko se pona\u0161a kao dete, hirovito, nepredvidljivo\u2026dozvoljava sebi takve neartikulisane ispade\u2026a posle \u010dak ozbiljno ni ne razmisli o tome\u201c.<\/em> Da, nije lako po\u0161tovati nekoga ko ne kontroli\u0161e sopstveno pona\u0161anje. Deca roditelja sa problemima neutralizacije i mentalizacije uglavnom \u201ebiraju\u201c dve strategije: ili postanu \u201eneprimetni\u201c, da ne izazivaju, ne smetaju, ne provociraju\u2026ili razviju strategiju \u201etuk na luk\u201c \u2013 agresivno, impulsivno pona\u0161anje koje te\u017ei da nadja\u010da emotivne ispade takvog roditelja. Deca postaju \u201esenzitizirana\u201c na emotivne ispade roditelja i reaguju besom ili \u201eotka\u010dinjenjem\u201c na emotivne ispade roditelja, ili \u010dak i na njihove nagove\u0161taje (\u201emakni mi se bre\u2026mar\u0161 iz moje sobe histeri\u010dni nekontrolisani idiote\u2026\u201c<\/em>). Izbor strategije zavisi i od toga koliko se pla\u0161e roditelja (\u201eotka\u010dinjanje\u201c je \u010de\u0161\u0107a strategija prema majkama. Naj\u010de\u0161\u0107e kre\u0107e u tinejd\u017eerskom uzrastu).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tabela 26-sposobnost neutralizacije, mentalizacije i sposobnost za ljubav<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sposobnost: Neutralizacija, (razboritost), Menatlizacija

Ispoljavanje razvijene sposobnosti:

Neutralizacija: U ljubavnim odnosima osoba je u stanju da \u201csti\u0161a strasti\u201d, reaguje razumno i trezveno, usmerena je na re\u0161avanje problema. Sna\u017ena ose\u0107anja ne ugro\u017eavaju racionalno mi\u0161ljenje, ve\u0107 postaju \u201cpogonsko gorivo\u201d osobe za re\u0161avanje problema, dostizanje cilja.

Menatlizacija: osoba je sposobna da razume sopstvena ose\u0107anja, da ih mentalno obradu\u2026sposobna je da razume i stanja drugih ljudi, da ih dublje upozna, po\u0161tuje i voli<\/th><\/tr><\/thead><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
Ispoljavanje nedostatka: neutralizacija: u ljubavnim odnosima osoba ima iskrivljenu sliku stvarnosti obojenu agresivnim ili libidinoznim impulsima, iracionalno mi\u0161ljenje, preplavljeno agresijom ili libidinoznom potrebom, zaslepljenost emocijama, impulsivno pona\u0161anje, iracionalno pona\u0161anje. Do\u017eivljaj \u201cto je ja\u010de od mene\u201d, \u201cobuzelo me\u201d, \u201cmoram to da dobijem ili uradim po svaku cenu\u2026ne mogu da mislim o posledicama\u201d\u2026 Nisu u stanju da vladaju svojim afektima \u2013 obuzimaju ih, kao \u0161to nisu u stanju da razumeju svoje postupke, pa ni postupke drugih.

nesposobnost mentalizacije:<\/strong> nesposobnost da se razmi\u0161lja o svom unutra\u0161njem stanju, nesposobnost za razumevanje \u010dinjenice da drugi imaju sopstvena uverenja, \u017eelje i namere.

To vodi do smanjene sposobnosti za racionalnu brigu o drugima, odgovornost i po\u0161tovanje drugih. Nedostatak mentalizacije onemogu\u0107ava razumevanje i poznavanje druge osobe, \u0161to bitno umanjuje kapacitet za zrelu ljubav.

Partneri ili deca osoba sa ovim problemima su \u201eslu\u0111eni\u201c njihovim nepredvidljivim impulsivnim pona\u0161anjima.<\/th><\/tr><\/thead><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

IZVOD IZ KNJIGE \u201eSPOSOBNOST ZA LJUBAV I RAD I OLI INTEGRATIVNA PSIHODINAMSKA PSIHOTERAPIJA.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Neboj\u0161a Jovanovi\u0107, Beoknjiga 2013.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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